Overheard in the Office: Ball-in-a-cup Edition

(Tommy is trying to get the ball into a cup, see above image)
Tommy: I just want to get it in once.
Tommy: It went in and bounced back out!
Tommy (after about 3 minutes of attempts): I finally got it in! It usually doesn't take this long.
(Later, with everyone around)
Tommy (makes it into cup on first try): Yeah I can do it when everyone else is here, but when I'm by myself...

(Tommy is in a Google Chat with Scott and Janelle)
Rachel: Are you in a three-way with Scott and Janelle?

Rach: My e-mail has an STD
Amy: Sender-transmitted disease?

Jeff: What's my cube's name?

Rach: The cube of loneliness and crappy hair.

Jeff: I just wanted to remind you that I'm trying to get on Batman.

Rach: Stop. He doesn't like it.

Jeff: Batman? OH I JUST GOT IT!

Rach: A year from now, if I'm lying on the side of the road dying, am I going to be more glad that I put cupboards in the laundry room or that I went to China?

Janelle: Shut up. Our baby would be a tripod.

Scott: Welp, I'll be boiling with a smile.

Janelle: You would need a lottttt of Viagra.

[Upon discovering that Janelle has an abnormally short tongue]

Rach: So you can't like, lick anything.

Janelle: Umm . . . I'm okay with that.

Rach: How do you eat ice cream?

Scott: Yeah, how do you eat ice cream?

Janelle: It's kinda rough, I have to lick it really hard.

Scott: I'm done with this.

Scott: I remember when my parents were picking out names for my baby brother, and the name Coca-Cola was in the baby book.

Rach: What the hell?

Scott: Yeah, and it was the only name in the book that was stylized.

Janelle: How old were you?

Scott: Three.

Rach: Why was Coca-Cola in a baby name book? Coca-Cola Lehman!

Scott: I don't know, but can you imagine? "Hey, Coke, can you get me a you?"

Scott: What's under that green sticky note on Kanye West's face?

Janelle: . . . Kanye . . . West's . . . face?

Janelle: It's always so damn hot in this cube.

Rach: Is it this light? Maybe that's why it's hotter in here.

Janelle: I don't know, I don't think Slehman's hot . . . maybe it's just me.

Janelle: Wow.

Janelle: It was perfect, it fit in, no one had to try too hard . . .

Rach: WE WRECKED THAT KID.