Sorry, Wrong Pants #19 - First Comes the Cheese

Cheese Rushmore

I've been sitting here for awhile now, trying to think of what to write. Usually it's some kind of nonsense that has nothing to do with the accompanying podcast. But I'm fresh out of ideas, preoccupied with other things in my head...

I'm moving to New York City TOMORROW. I have a paid apprenticeship starting next week working for Vimeo. It's going to be an adventure, to say the least. To say the most, extremely stressful for the next couple of days.

I'm going to miss my friends here at Accidental Jeggings, all my friends here around Detroit, and the city of Detroit herself. I've been working with these people for some time now, and they've kept things interesting, in a good way, during the past couple of years. You guys rock.

Sorry to get a little sentimental here. We talk about cheese, work, and occasionally mention poop jokes.

Today's Panel
Janelle, Rachel, Charles, Jeff, Scott, Tommy, and introducing James.

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Sorry, Wrong Pants #18 - Going Commando

I saw X-Men: First Class over the weekend, and it is now my favourite out of all the X-Men movies. Why? Because it didn't feel like a "typical" X-Men movie or a "typical" superhero/comic book movie. Instead, I daresay that First Class felt almost James Bond-ish in its presentation. No, seriously, the movie takes place in '68 during the Cuban Missile Crisis, and the social commentary on the world at the time is hilarious (and so sexist at times... and one blatantly racist edit.) Oh yeah, and mutant super powers, Kevin Bacon, etc.

There were a couple of cameos in the movie that I thoroughly enjoyed ("Go f- yourself" was great), including a cameo/minor part by Michael Ironside, who plays a small role as a Navy Captain. I kind of equate Ironside as playing the even more manly and legitimate Ron Swanson. Where Ron Swanson (or, um, Nick Offerman) is manly man but over-the-top in execution, Michael Ironside and every part he plays is spot on MAN. He's always a military commander who takes charge of the situation, and his every entrance requires full orchestral fanfare.

Not to mention he's played Naval officers (Top Gun, X-Men: First Class), submarine captain (SeaQuest 2032), squadron leader (Starship Troopers)... yeah he's badass.

Also, his last name is IRONSIDE. Come on. The guy grew up knowing he could kick ass.

Today's Panel
Janelle, Rachel, Scott, Tommy, Charles, Jeff, and a special introduction from President Barack Obama*.

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*not actually Barack Obama.

Sorry, Wrong Pants #16 - Who is Shawty?

The second result for the Google Image Search of "Who is Shawty?"

Ever run out of steam?

Now that's a funny phrase "run out of steam". I know that it's referring to old steam locomotives, but when exactly did that cross over to mean that a person has run out of energy? When someone is tired, you never hear them say, "Oh man, I'm melting down" or "Somehow there's no water flowing through my turbines today" or even "My solar panels are covered in dust and are unable to capture the full potential of energy from the sun."

In retrospect, yeah, it does make sense. Nevermind then, carry on.

Today's Panel
Janelle, Rachel, Scott, Tommy, and special guest Pogo!

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Sorry, Wrong Pants #15 - The MANcast

The ladies are out, and the MEN are in! Cars, sports, man caves, dens, and meat. Lots of meat. 

Throw a steak on the grill, it's the all MALE podcast today... for the ladies.

Today's Panel
Scott and Tommy

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For the ladies.

Sorry, Wrong Pants #14 - nobodylikestoplaywithmy.cat

Ben: What do you say, do you want to play?

Us: YEAH!

Ben: Let's take a ride on the CA$H CAB! What are your names?

Us: Janellerachelscottjefftommy!

Ben: And where are we heading? 

Us: Nebraska.

Ben: Nebraska Avenue?

Us: No, the state.

Ben: Oh. Well I'm just going to drop you guys off here...

Us: We haven't even moved. We're actually further away from our destination!

Ben: I actually had to loop around and pick up Ron.

Us: Ron?

The taxi comes to a stop and the door slides open.

Ron Pitts: I'm Ron Pitts. And this is Destroyed in Seconds!

Us: YAAAAAAAYYYY!

Today's Panel

Janelle, Jeff, Rachel, Scott, Tommy, and special guest Dave!

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Life hangs in the balance.

Sorry, Wrong Pants #13 - THIS IS BLUE DEVIL COUNTRY

(Technical note: This should be good now.)

You see, it starts over a year ago, when Scott went to a thrift store. Sargent Pepper left a frock behind, and Scott thought, "oh, I know half a t-shirt that this may match!"

Scott labored, worked hard sewing, day and night, until he had it: the perfect hybrid between a long-sleeve frock and a short sleeve shirt. He wore it into the office one day (fun side story: instead of Accidental Jeggings Productions we were almost Short-sleeve Jacket Frock Productions) but he felt incomplete. There was something missing.

Scott then spent three months carefully cutting, chopping, and slicing up foamcore and cardboard to construct his own backup cardboard standee army. It was quite the ordeal, we didn't see him for months.

Then, one triumphant day, Scott returned, cardboard army in tow. He set them up in his cube, and around the office, proclaiming his victory and dominance over all. Yet still, this wasn't enough. In a shocking revelation, Scott discovered an entire thrift store comprised of clothing donated by Sargent Pepper.

Scott retired to his chambers, sewing frocks and shirts together to create a uniform fit for a battalion. He recruited and paid off men and women to have them join his cause. His plan worked, and dressed in these half-shirt-half-frock uniforms, Scott formed an army.

Finally, the day came, not too long ago. Scott's Army surged towards the campus, dominating and destroying all that came in his way. There was just one thing he wasn't counting on...

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Deer God

Sorry, Wrong Pants #12 - In the bowels of the toilet

Did anyone watch The Voice on NBC the other night? That show is SWEET. No sarcasm, really, I highly highly enjoyed the show. Within 30 minutes I could tell which artist would turn around and select the singer... Cee Lo was especially easy to figure out. Adam, the dude from Maroon 5, has the best team so far. That one kind of chubbier guy has a voice, damn. Country music dude Blake is kind of a douche, but at least he's a douche in an entertaining way. Christina Aguilera is looking beautiful as always, and her little rivalry with Adam that has formed already is entertaining.

And I love that Carson Daly is the host of the show. It's nice to see him on TV not at 3am. Can you believe he's had that super late night show on NBC for almost 10 years now? I've never watched it, to be honest. It's on too late. And when I am up that late, I'm usually out with friends or something of the like. 

Nevertheless it's nice to see him and Christina Aguilera on TV together not on TRL. Those were the days, man.

We talked toilets at some point during the show. Don't hold your breath.

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I sat on a $6,400 Toilet and it changed my life.

Sorry, Wrong Pants #11 - Uncle Ron's Ice Cream Truck

Man, I miss original PlayStation games sometimes. The convenience and ubiquity of games and entertainment is so incredible now, especially compared to 15-some years ago. The kids today will be growing up playing multiplayer games against their friends on the internets, and on their iPod touches and DS screens. They'll never know the fun and joy of games like Twisted Metal 2, where you sat down in front of your TV next to your buddy, and you'd lose hours upon hours playing it; unlocking levels and characters the hard way (we didn't have no internets to look up cheat codes!) - That's freedom my friends, that's freedom.

This rant has absolutely nothing to do with the podcast.


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Good luck driver, and welcome to Twisted Metal.

Sorry, Wrong Pants #10 - Schwarzenegger on the Struggle Bus

I was pushed to the ground, but then I arose again, and I proclaimed, "Thou cannot keep me on thy ground!" I was pushed to the ground, but then I arose again, and I proclaimed, "Thou cannot keep me on thy ground!"

Urinating the darkness away... urinating the darkness away!

He imbibes a liquor drink, he imbibes a potato drink, he imbibes a brewed drink, he imbibes an ale drink. He vocalizes the anthems regarding the exciting events, he vocalizes the anthems regarding the well-to-do times.

Don't weep for me, nearby resident of mine!

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What is a Chumbawumba anyway?

Sorry, Wrong Pants #9 - This Week in Disney

Technical note: Refresh your feed in iTunes and you should be able to download #9. For some reason iTunes was being directed to #8.

Tommy here. I went to Go Comedy last night instead of podcasting, yet I'm de facto in charge of writing the podcast description and posting it. I haven't listened to the episode the rest of the crew recorded last night, but I'm going to assume that these topics were possibly covered:

• Tumbleweeds
• Carnival games and their effect on youth society
• Canada, America's 52nd State
• Refrigerators and you: the hidden radioactive threat in your kitchen
• Cats
• The Price is Right
• Jason Statham

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Jason Statham in Gnomeo and Juliet.

Sorry, Wrong Pants #8 - Congratulations on your Achievement

Three-way pinky swear

After a brief hiatus, we're back with new episodes! This one is old. So old, I don't know what we talked about.

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Winner, winner, chicken dinner.

Sorry, Wrong Pants #6 - Jeff cried at the end of Titanic

Tommy: Should I name this episode, "Jeff cried at the end of Titanic" or "Titanic made Jeff cry"?

Scott: "Titanic made Jeff cry"

Janelle: "Jeff cried at the end of Titanic"

Jeff: It wasn't crying, I just had a few tears.

Amy: "Jeff drowning in an ocean of tears."
Scott: "The gang struggles to come up with a title for the podcast which is largely based around Jeff crying at the end of Titanic."

In addition, do not eat Pączkis while listening to this podcast.

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Here is an exclamation point!

Sorry, Wrong Pants #5 - Don't Drink the BLT Shot

Yep, Sorry, Wrong Pants is now five weeks old. IT'S ALMOST A BIG KID!!! On the docket for today: Dr. Seuss, sibling stories, favourite animals, and ill-conceived ideas (like this podcast).

For the first time ever, we also streamed our recording LIVE TO A STUDIO INTERNET AUDIENCE. Stay tuned on The Facebook and Tweetter for updates on when we go live.

If you're curious what goes on behind the scenes (on the INTERNET), read our roundtable chat for what we were talking about in the Accidental Backchannel.

Also: the download link for Episode 4 should be working correctly again. Sorry for the inconvenience, loyal fan.

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The Backchannel

Edited for language/some content, and no, no context will be provided, nor will you really know who's talking, mainly because I don't remember.

[Not the true "backchannel", just our group chat on Facebook during the livestream of our podcast.]

*WARNING*: this can get a little racy at times, be forewarned.

Sorry, Wrong Pants #4 - Spanx, Blanks, and Automobiles

What is rick rolling? Rusty old GM cars from the 90's, hair and body styles, and mayonnaise makes Rachel want to vomit. It's another award winning episode* of Sorry, Wrong Pants!

*award pending

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Sorry, Wrong Pants #3 - Boats n' Hoes!

This week's episode is listing to starboard! Hurricane Gina's coming in from the East! She's going down with a boatload of nautical themes! 

Also, Rachel-2 is single, and no one can figure out why.

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Sorry, Wrong Pants #2 - The Future, Mars, Taste Testing

Once again, the idiots in the basement made the podcast difficult to download. But the Eternal Leader (me) has made it possible for you, dear reader, listener, and all-around good fellow, to easily download and subscribe.

The second episode of our premiere program features the gang recalling their childhood aspirations, a visitor from Mars, and a taste test that will keep the raccoons away from the Jeggings Blog Offices for months to come.


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Sorry, Wrong Pants #1 - Pilot

Look here, scumbags! The lower minions in the Accidental Jeggings Production Offices, aka the emergency volunteer interns, posted our podcasts in an inefficient manner that required the tears of rabbits and angels to download. In addition, tags were wrong (who the hell is Scott Lehman?) and there was a distinct lack of lemons and balloons.

But now, thanks to TECHNOLOGY, we have an RSS FEED that you can COPY AND PASTE into your favourite MEDIA PLAYER such as iTUNES or ZUNE to SUBSCRIBE. Yeah, we can do that now.

So again, here is our Pilot episode. It's actually quite bad.

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